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“CRITICIZE MY THIGHS?!” J.LO RIPS NOT-SO-SMART TOYBOY CASPER

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ER,…NO-BRAINER, MR. SMART!

Not-so-smart CASPER SMART suddenly wished he’d kept his big yap shut when he went where no guy should EVER go (no words like “fat” or “old,” right, fellas?) and told live-in love JENNIFER LOPEZ that her thighs are “too big” for the short minidresses she sports on “American Idol!”…YeeeOOWW!...

Spotting smoke blasting from her ears, ex-backup dancer/toyboy Casper back-pedaled pronto, saying he didn’t mean that she’s got…er, fat thighs – it’s just that her thighs aren’t…er, her best asset, maybe?... YeeIKES!...(Dude, even for a guy, so stooopid!)

Jennifer erupted instantly, shrieking: “If you’re not saying my thighs are fat – then what are you saying?”

Desperate to save himself, Casper stammered: “I just meant your thighs are…muscular!”

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